Which RPG Does the Most with the Least Words?

During the month of August, I’m participating in RPG a Day 2017. Each day I’ll answer a question, or my interpretation of a question, about tabletop roleplaying games. For those who have wanted your beloved UncleBear to get back into RPG blogging, this is the closest you’re going to get.

Which RPG Does the Most with the Least Words?

For me, this is Sea Dracula. You play anthropomorphic animal lawyers arguing a major case in the Animal City courts. You call witnesses and present evidence for no reason other than to be weird. In most games you end up deciding who won the case by having a dance-off. Sea Dracula, by the way, is the name of Animal City’s greatest lawyer, who is a giraffe in a business suit. It is completely surreal and ridiculous and highly silly. And you get all of the mileage out of two pages. One sheet of paper, both sides. With relatively low copy density, at that.

I know that this probably isn’t the sort of answer that this question was looking for. But I spent a whole $1 USD on this game and no other game has given me the per-word level of fun as Seas Dracula. I have run it at conventions for large groups of people. We have pulled people away from other game tables to testify as witnesses, and no one has objected to the interruption. Sometimes we’ve had a box of animal masks and props to allow players to get into character. In many cases, we have had cosplayers dancing on tables. It just gets strange in the most delightful way possible.

Everyone should play Sea Dracula. In fact, there are days when I wish that Sea Dracula was real life. I want this sort of unrestrained insanity, this blend of Looney Toons, the Marx Brothers, and a fever dream, all the time. It certain beats the pants off of anything else that’s happening in the world right now.



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