7:00 am EEST (GMT+3). This is the June 11 2020 daily proof of life post. I sincerely hope that everyone is safe and healthy, and able to make the most of this day we’ve been given.
I’m falling into one of my “why do I bother” phases. Normally that means depression is back creeping in. While I’m definitely going to monitor my moods and energy levels, I’m not sure that’s entirely it this time. A lot of it, I believe, comes from quitting Twitter. It got me thinking about what else I can cut. What other things aren’t adding value, and just draining my time and peace of mind?
My two personal metrics are productivity and self-care. If something isn’t helping me accomplish a goal, or contributing to my physical and mental well-being, than it is at most an extremely low priority. Naturally, I end up reevaluating my blogs. The business site is a no brainer; that portal is a necessary evil. Increasingly over these past three months I’ve come to view this blog as a vital part of my self-care routine. It’s a journal, where I can vent a bit. In lieu of social media, it’s a means of connecting with people.
Why I Bother
There’s a hidden third metric, though. It’s one that I need to bring to the fore and put more consideration into. Beyond what I’m doing for myself, what am I putting out into the world? Not “is this post entertaining” or “is this essay useful”. How are the things I’m putting out, including this blog, the zines, the books I write, impacting suffering? For those that recognize that this blog has continuity, yes, this is also affected by my recent ruminations of Mister Rogers.
The blog will continue. You may see a shift in tone going forward as I try to be mindful about what I’m saying and how I’m saying it, but it will go on. It has been helpful to my mental health, which is reason enough. Even if a post helps one person get through the day, that’s a huge bonus. I will continue to consciously find my way forward.